My name is John, but only when I'm in trouble. I'm Jack most of the time.

I think there’s loneliness and there's being alone. I never feel alone because of what St. Benedict’s has given me. What did Jesus say? “Do not be afraid. I am with you always.” 

God is transcendent. If you're with God, and God is also with someone else, the other people that are with God are with you, so you're never alone.

When I pull into the parking lot at St. Benedict it feels like I'm home. I have four kids and five grandkids who live within 70 miles of me but I actually feel more at home here. I don't feel separated from them because I see them quite often and send text messages to everyone before I go to bed at night.

When I think of loneliness, I think of two people whose deaths I experienced. I don’t even know the name of the first. He was 23 years old, my age at the time, and died right in front of me. He was a North Vietnamese Lieutenant.

I often think of him when I think of someone who has no one to pray for them. His family has no idea what happened to him – no idea where he is or even where he's buried. He was evacuated in a helicopter and pronounced dead when he got to a hospital.

I was with my wife when she passed away, too. Her leaving was tragic and that's probably when I felt the loneliest. But I think about the transcendence of God, the fact that life doesn't end, that his suffering and death on the cross defeated death and the fact that he loved us enough to give his life for us.

When I was waiting for her funeral service to begin one of the staff persons at St. Benedict came up to me and just stood next to me and listened to what I was saying. I'll never forget that.

People need to be listened to and that's what I try to do, you know, listen to other people. Everybody has a story, and their stories are so different. People are so happy and relieved to be able to tell their story.

There are so many people in this world that we see on a daily basis and we never take the time to stop and say, “How are you? My name is Jack. What's your name?”

Sometimes my grandkids get upset when I do that at a supermarket or a restaurant. But if you find out somebody's name, it shows you have respect for them.

As a veteran, I have a lot of friends that have sealed themself off because of survivor guilt. And you can't do that. It's very, very tempting to be a hermit and close yourself off but each one of us needs each other.